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Peter Jones - EntrepreneurHe probably hates himself far more than me - he said ‘yes’ when they asked him to do another series of “American Inventor” which it has just been my misfortune to watch.

 

I hate myself for watching the brain liquefying drivel and not simply getting up and ramming my head through the French windows or something equally as useless and bad for my mental state.

 

Why am I quite so hateful towards myself, and why do I suspect that Peter desperately regrets that ‘yes’ to his agent?

 

Therapy Doll.

 

Therapy Doll Therapy Doll is the result of genetically bonding a Smurf (remember them?) to a plush toy and mixing it with the type of feel good therapy that you get only in the US and the most expensive of “spas” in the UK.

 

You squeeze the hateful things’ toes and it tells you that

 

“everything is going to be alright”

Well, okay. This guy has his moustachioed life partner telling him what a great idea it is, and he is obviously very into his hugs and cuddles - no problem with that, and it isn’t hateful or frightening to see two men obviously in love and very much together - even if they don’t seem to want to own up to it on the TV.

 

What IS hateful AND frightening in almost equal measures is the voice of this damnable thing. Let me tell you that someone sold this guy the voiceover from a B-Movie horror film that didn’t get made. The voice is a disembodied female, who genuinely sounds like she is speaking from ‘the other side’.

 

If I had one of these dolls in my life (and if you buy one for me I will be the first to do all I can to stop YOU sleeping!) and was feeling down for any reason, then hearing that creepy witch telling me that it was going to be okay would be enough to shove me over the edge with a full bottle of whiskey, 400 paracetamol AND the shotgun…

 

So that is why I hate me. I sat watching the show long enough to treat you to this explanation of what it did to me.

 

Peter hates himself because he was part of the judging panel who put this monstrosity through with a $50 000 prize and a chance to compete in the finals to win $1 000 000.

 

Shame on you Peter.

You can replay the horror that you experienced when you entered this post by clicking the button below.

[kml_flashembed movie="http://www.mytherapybuddy.com/hearmewho.swf" width="200" height="100" wmode="transparent" /]

 

I have run out of coffee - fancy buying me one?

Tags: agent, alright, American, american inventor, b movie, bonding, bottle, brain, chance, creepy, cuddles, dolls, drivel, edge, explanation, french windows, guy, head, hearing, horror, horror film, idea, life, love, misfortune, monstrosity, panel, paracetamol, part, partner, Peter, Peter Jones, plush toy, prize, problem, reason, series, Shame, shotgun, side, smurf, someone, something, spas in the uk, state, Therapy, two men, type, UK, US, voiceover, whiskey, witch

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